My roommate's kitten keeps climbing on my face and trying to meow into my mouth.
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
April 2012
30 posts
Just dyed my hair while waiting for my challah dough to rise in the fridge because I'm a modern fucking woman!
Also, I just used some canola oil to add shine to my dull post-dye job hair. I MIGHT BE THE LIVING EMBODIMENT OF REDBOOK MAGAZINE.
“Thanks for kissing me even though a bird just pooped on my head.”
—Me, on a typical first date.
The Slurring Bee →
facebook.com
This is a thing that I’ve already been to before at a bookstore once.
FIRST EPISODE OF LAW & ORDER EVER.
And there’s already a Det. TakesItTooPersonal.
Going old school.
First season Law & Order, here I come!
Who else spent the last two hours filling the online shopping cart at Lowes.com with gardening tools/accessories?
Weighing the pros/cons of a shade sail vs. a market umbrella. You know, grown-up stuff.
“I started working at H&M and got really in to fashion, so I’m a lot prettier now.”
—The exact moment I realized that some high school friends would stay just high school friends.
“In 1996 in Whanganui, New Zealand, a 21-year-old man burst into a radio station (Star FM) and took the manager hostage. His demand was to play “Rainbow Connection” by Kermit the Frog.”
—Me too, man. Me too.
On dating vegans.
I have much respect for vegans. I’ve been a vegetarian for going on 13 years now, and it’s part of who I am and whatever. People do it and it’s normal and I don’t care if you’re a vegan.
But the more I think about dating vegans, the more I realize that more than looking for someone to grow old with, I’m looking for someone to split a box of Kraft Mac & Cheese with. Vegans don’t do that orange cheese powder.
Oh boy, the social minefield that is the blind carbon copy.
Why was I copied on this? Why didn’t she want anyone to KNOW I was copied on this? Was this an accident? Were other people BCC’d? What does this mean? Am I in trouble or something? Should I respond?
Don't you hate it when you come up with a pretty good joke, then some asshole asks some sort of logic-inducing follow up question to said joke that pushes you to justify the joke based on reason and known assumptions about the way things work, which then pushes the joke TOO far and it stops being funny because some jerk thought HE was being funny by trampling your joke.
Really, online dating is so stupid.
Between you and me and the entire Internet, I'm going through a real and pronounced phase of my dating life.
In which I have a crush on every boy.
reblog if you want anonymous opinions of you
I just want more messages!!
You are nothing like me unless you also have at some point in your adult life trimmed away the moldy parts and eaten the rest of a 2-week-old peanut butter chocolate crispy bar you found in your fridge.
You are nothing like me.
Game of Thrones has really exposed me to how many different shapes of women's breasts and nipples there are.
